Dealing With Negative Comments — A Guide for Parent Creators

You remember the first nice comment. Someone you’ve never met telling you your baby is beautiful, that your video made them smile, that they needed this today.

You will also remember the first mean one.

It hits different when it’s about your child. A stranger criticising your outfit is annoying. A stranger criticising how you hold your baby, what you feed them, or the fact that you filmed them at all, that lands somewhere deeper. Somewhere primal.

This guide is here for that moment. The moment you read something that makes your stomach drop. We’re going to walk through what to expect, what to do, and how to protect yourself so you can keep creating without carrying someone else’s cruelty.

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The types of negative comments you’ll get

They fall into five categories. Once you know the categories, they lose most of their power.

The parenting police. “You shouldn’t let baby do X.” “That blanket isn’t safe.” “Why isn’t baby wearing socks?” These people have opinions about everything and expertise in nothing. They patrol comment sections like it’s their full-time job. It might be.

Unsolicited medical advice. “That looks like eczema, you should see a doctor.” “Baby’s head shape looks off.” “Have you had them tested for X?” These comments come from a place of concern, sometimes. But they are not your doctor. Your baby has a paediatrician. The comment section is not a clinic.

Privacy critics. “Why are you filming your child?” “Your baby can’t consent to this.” “This is exploitation.” This is the most common criticism family creators face, and it deserves its own section below.

General trolls. Meaningless cruelty. Comments designed to provoke, not communicate. Someone having a bad day and choosing your video as the place to put it. These people comment the same thing on every video they watch. It is not personal, even when it feels deeply personal.

The rare genuinely concerning comment. This is the one that matters. Occasionally, someone will point out something you genuinely missed, a safety hazard in the background, a product recall, something worth checking. Learning to tell the difference between this and the noise is one of the most useful skills you’ll develop.

Watch how Myka Stauffer addressed criticism directly in her early family vlogging days. She was honest about how comments affected her and why she chose to keep creating. Her transparency gave other parent creators permission to be human about it.

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The 3-second rule

Read it. Feel it. Take 3 seconds. Then decide.

You have exactly three options: respond, delete, or ignore. That’s it. There is no fourth option where you win an argument with a stranger on the internet. That option does not exist.

Most comments deserve: delete and move on. Not because you’re avoiding conflict. Because your time and energy are worth more than a reply that person will forget they provoked by tomorrow.

Never respond when emotional. If you feel the heat in your chest, the tightness in your jaw, the urge to type fast, stop. Write the response if you need to. Put your phone down. Wait an hour. Then read what you wrote. Nine times out of ten, you’ll delete it. The tenth time, you’ll edit it into something measured and dignified. Both are wins.

Elle Mills, a Filipino-Canadian creator who’s been open about the mental health toll of online negativity, talks about this exact pattern, the urge to respond, the regret when you do, and the freedom when you learn not to.

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Setting up comment filters

This takes 5 minutes. Do it now. Not after the first bad comment. Now. Before you need it. Think of it as baby-proofing your comment section.

YouTube

1. Open YouTube Studio
2. Go to Settings (bottom left)
3. Click Community
4. Scroll to Blocked words
5. Paste your keyword list (below), separated by commas
6. Save

You can also enable Hold potentially inappropriate comments for review, which catches most nastiness before it ever goes public.

Instagram

1. Go to Settings and Privacy
2. Tap Hidden Words
3. Turn on Hide comments
4. Add your custom words and phrases in Manage custom words and phrases

TikTok

1. Go to Settings and Privacy
2. Tap Privacy
3. Tap Comments
4. Turn on Filter keywords
5. Add your keyword list

Your pre-built keyword list

Copy and paste this list into every platform’s filter. Add to it as needed.

ugly, stupid, idiot, moron, disgusting, hate, horrible, worst, trash, garbage, abuse, neglect, CPS, bad parent, bad mother, bad father, terrible parent, exploitation, exploiting, poor kid, feel sorry, ugly baby, fat, hideous, shut up, unfit, pathetic, cringe, clout chasing, using your kid, money hungry, shame, ashamed

Adjust this list to your experience. If certain words keep appearing in negative comments on your content, add them. If some of these words appear naturally in your niche (like “ugly” in an “ugly sweater” video), remove those specific ones. This is your list. Make it work for you.

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When to respond, when to delete, when to ignore

This is your decision tree. Print it. Screenshot it. Refer to it when your instinct is to fire back.

Respond

• Genuine questions asked respectfully (“What brand is that carrier?”)
• Factual corrections that are actually correct (“The recall was for the 2024 model, not the 2025”)
• Kind concern phrased gently (“Just wanted to mention, the AAP updated their sleep guidelines”)

When you respond, keep it short, warm, and final. One reply. You are not entering a debate.

Delete

• Insults directed at you, your partner, or your child
• Unsolicited medical diagnoses from strangers
• Parenting shaming in any form
• Comments designed to make you feel guilty
• Anything that makes your stomach tighten when you read it

You do not owe an explanation for deleting a comment. It’s your space. Curate it.

Ignore

• Trolls who are clearly seeking attention
• Vague negativity with no specific point (“this is bad”)
• Comments that are mean but not worth the energy of deleting
• Anything where engaging would only feed the fire

Block

• Repeat offenders who keep coming back
• Anyone whose comments make you feel unsafe
• Creepy comments about your child’s appearance
• Anyone who crosses the line from criticism to harassment

Blocking is not dramatic. Blocking is maintenance. You lock your front door every night. This is the same thing.

Sam and Nia, a family of seven who’ve been vlogging for over a decade, have spoken openly about developing thick skin while staying kind. Their longevity on the platform is partly because they learned early when to engage and when to let go.

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The privacy criticism

“Why are you filming your child?”

You will hear this more than any other criticism. From strangers, from comment sections, sometimes from family members. It is the background noise of family content creation.

Here is the truth: you do not owe anyone an explanation.

You are making a choice about your family. You are doing it thoughtfully. You are sharing moments you’ve chosen to share, in ways you’ve chosen to share them. Every family makes a thousand decisions a day that strangers could second-guess. This is one of them.

If you want to respond, keep it simple. One sentence is enough:

“We share our family’s story thoughtfully and with love. Thanks for watching.”

That’s it. No justification. No lengthy defence. No argument. A statement, not a debate.

Consider addressing this once and pinning it. Write a pinned comment or an FAQ entry on your channel page. Something like:

“We get asked about this a lot. We share our family’s journey because it brings us joy and connects us with an amazing community of parents. We’re thoughtful about what we post and our children’s privacy is always our first priority. If family content isn’t for you, we totally understand. Thanks for being here if it is.”

Then, when the comment appears again (and it will), you can choose to link to your pinned response or simply move on. You’ve said your piece. You don’t have to say it again.

The Ingham Family, a British family of seven, addressed this criticism head-on in a dedicated video. Whether you agree with every choice they’ve made or not, their willingness to engage with the question honestly is worth watching.

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Protecting your mental health

The comment section is not a measure of your worth as a parent. Read that again.

Limit comment-reading to once a day. Not every hour. Not every time you see a notification. Once. Batch it. Read, respond to the good ones, delete the bad ones, and close the app. This single habit will change your experience of being a creator.

Have someone else screen comments if you need to. Your partner. A friend. A moderator you trust. There is no rule that says you have to be the person who reads every comment. On YouTube, you can add moderators in Studio. On Instagram and TikTok, you can restrict who comments. Use these tools.

Remember the ratio. For every negative comment, there are 100 people who watched your video, smiled, and moved on without saying anything. The silent majority is on your side. Negative comments are louder, not more numerous.

Take breaks when posting stops feeling fun. If you open the camera and feel dread instead of excitement, that’s your signal. Put it down. A week. A month. However long you need. Your audience will be there when you come back. And if some of them aren’t, they weren’t your people anyway.

It is okay to turn comments off entirely. Many successful family channels do this. It does not hurt your reach as much as you think. It does not mean you’ve “let the trolls win.” It means you’ve prioritised your peace. That’s a power move, not a retreat.

Colleen Ballinger’s husband Erik Stocklin has spoken about the toll that online negativity takes on family life, not just on the creator, but on the partner, the kids, the whole household. His perspective as “the partner of a creator” is one that doesn’t get talked about enough.

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When comments cross a line

Most negative comments are noise. But some are danger signals. Know the difference.

Threats

Any comment that threatens physical harm to you, your partner, or your child, no matter how vague, no matter how “joking,” must be taken seriously.

1. Screenshot it before it’s deleted or edited
2. Report it to the platform immediately
3. Report it to your local police (you can file a report online in most areas)
4. Save the screenshot somewhere permanent (email it to yourself, save to cloud storage)

Stalking behaviour

If someone is commenting on every video, tracking your location from background details, referencing where you live, or showing up across multiple platforms, this is not a fan. This is a safety concern.

1. Document everything (screenshots with dates and timestamps)
2. Report to every platform where the behaviour occurs
3. Consider consulting a lawyer about a restraining order or cease and desist
4. Review your content for location identifiers (house numbers, school names, street signs, car number plates)

Comments sexualising your child

Report immediately. Do not engage. Do not reply.

1. Report the comment to the platform
2. Block the account
3. Report to NCMEC (National Center for Missing and Exploited Children) at CyberTipline.org or 1-800-843-5678
4. If outside the US, report to your country’s equivalent agency (CEOP in the UK, AFP in Australia)

This is not overreacting. Platforms take these reports seriously, and so should you.

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The bottom line

Comments are noise. Your family’s story is the signal.

A thousand strangers with opinions will never know what it feels like to be in your house, holding your baby, living your actual life. They see a three-minute video. You see the whole picture.

Keep telling your story. Protect your peace. Delete freely. Block without guilt.

The people who matter are watching and smiling and never leaving a comment at all. They’re the ones who send your video to their pregnant friend at midnight with the message “watch this, it helped me.” You’ll never see that message. But it’s there.

Your story matters. Keep going.